They grow up so quickly!
Check out these photos. I had JT on my lap the other night near the computer and next thing I know, he's leaning forward trying to do something. I about rolled on the floor laughing when I saw what it was. "Like daddy, like son".... (Seriously, the only time I have to do this blog stuff is when they are napping or sleeping).
Looking ahead...
Just when I think I have this twin parenting thing somewhat down, I read ahead to other twin parent's posts on various twin boards:
Question: Is anyone else totally exhausted?
Some replies:
"My babes will be 16 mos next week. It's a constant struggle to get diapers and clothes changed, and with the changing pad on the floor now, I'm always crawling after them to wrangle them back. I have one walker, and one serious cruiser, but they love to go in opposite directions, open closed doors, rip down books from the book shelves, tear out the paper (sometimes eat it too), and always throw food. I'm used to the house looking in disarray, but it doesn't mean I like it like that."
"Everyday I clean up, do laundry and everyday it looks like we have been robbed. You do what you can and make time for yourself."
At least the person finished with " My babies and hubby are my shining stars."
Breastfeeding twins, Part II ( part I below)
So why go through these whole trials and tribulations when I could have just gone to formula at some point? 1. I am a person who finishes what they start (I'm finding it to be a horrible character flaw at times, just kidding...) 2. Well, yes of course, it's been determined breast milk is best, blah, blah, blah…and yes I want my kids to have the benefits (no this isn't a promo for La Leche League, they irritate me stating everyone can do it etc....) I am also a healthcare worker in pediatrics so I will be exposed to MANY germs when I return to work and the sweet peas will not quite be old enough to get THEIR flu shots when they start daycare. Also, it was SUPPOSED to end up being more convenient for me had things actually worked out. You know, I could pop ‘em on, hang out for a bit and viola’, done. No bottle washing, no dealing with bottle feeding two at one time or having to wash bottles or preparing bottles or listening to them crying while I pumped. And I could get out of the house with just me, no pumping before hand feeding or bringing bottles etc...And think of all the money we would save with not using formula (why I could use that money and take a vacation to Hawaii next year...) So in the grand scheme of things, I had many reasons initially to try it. I knew it would be difficult but had no idea it would wind up like this.
Unfortunately, I think I wound up having more problems than most and having to utilize the ‘solutions’ with the most work: 1. Pumping 2. Breastfeeding eventually and 3. Having to use bottles anyway afterwards to supplement the amount I didn’t make for them. Ugh. All I can say is this is NOT for everyone and I don’t judge you at all for taking the bottle/formula solution especially if you have twins and especially if they have any difficulties. When it comes down to it, the classes don’t prepare you at all for the obstacles. They just gloss over it and say how easy, convenient and less expensive it will be when this is not always the case. And if you don’t have saintly husbands, extra outside help, and mucho dinero for all the extra equipment, consultations etc…it can be impossible to do. So in the end, is it worth it? I’m still trying to decide.
Obviously I want the best for my kids, but the best for everyone is a sane mommy (whatever that entails for your household), right?. And in my opinion, if you don't go this route, there will be MANY times in the future that you can give other things 100%. I personally would like to see parents giving the same dedication to teaching their kids the skills of hard work, personal responsibility, emotional intelligence, honesty, financial intelligence etc.. The many other skills to dealing with life beyond infancy and initial good health. These are truly things that will serve them all the way through life. Shouldn't the fervor continue or effort at least be placed here much more than just in the first year? No, this isn't a new revelation I've come to with all this. I did feel this way before the whole breastfeeding trials and, of course, I do plan to help nurture and hopefully develop those things in my kids. (Hopefully I won't be challenged as much as I was now and thank goodness I feel much more prepared for the other stuff...) In the end, do only what you are capable of, right?
Breastfeeding Twins 101
The many facets of breastfeeding: Part I
I’ve decided to write about my ongoing experience with breastfeeding the twins (or attempting to) because 1. If you ask me what I did on my maternity leave, it would entail mostly this and 2. There don’t seem to be many twin mommies crazy enough to attempt this and then write about their experiences. So hopefully someone looking for words of wisdom while venturing down this road will benefit from my trials and tribulations... (A word to twin mommies or twin mommy's-to-be. I think I had a worst case scenario. Your situation may not be like this so don't freak out). Anyway...Here it is:
Phase 1:
Hospital hangover, welcome to parenthood: I went into labor late on Saturday night and the twins were born at 3:50 a.m. Sunday morning. Needless to say, we got no sleep Saturday night and none through the next night. On a euphoric parent rush, we even had a few visitors Sunday and still didn’t really sleep. During this I, of course, attempted latching on/feeding with each twin when able and they seemed fine, until about 3:00 a.m. Monday morning (about the time my pain meds wore off) when the babies realized they were STARVING. Enter nurse who was attempting to be kind and help. Next ensued a roughly two hour nursing instruction attempt which ended with her coaxing me to roll over on the side where I was having searing pain on my incision and slapping on a breast pump in attempt to feed the kids some colostrum and practice latching. Not at all what I would wish on any new parent but when it’s 2:00 a.m in the morning, you’re in tons of pain, have two starving crying twin infants and haven’t slept for over 36 hours, your brain does not think logically in how to handle the situation. (
Note to self: Bring/rent own breast pump as milk may not come in that quickly, try it in private, and sleep a bit more.)Phase II: (Day 3-14)
Supplemental feeding…(is an insane method to recommend for twins). So I think we ended up that night with each twin swaddled up tightly and lying next to me, one in each arm to get them to stop crying. Luckily they went to sleep and daddy was able to get about an hour of sleep before the army of people flooded the room…mommy got none. Someone had to be the neurotic new parent to stayed awake to make sure they were breathing and not smothered etc…We also finally got the lactation consultant to come see us and she had concerns for their sucking so she recommended the supplemental feeding system. For those of you not familiar with it, it entails a syringe with a thin tube attached to it in which you place around your finger and in the baby’s mouth, then push milk out. It is supposed to help prevent nipple “confusion”. (But as we discovered later, our kiddies just developed a preference for it and would hang out and wait for the milk to be pushed out rather than sucking). So the Lactation Consultant said to pump and use this until my milk came in and I would be fine once it did. Well that was not the case. We headed home and our new parent schedule went like this: Babies awaken, mom struggles to get set up with twin nursing pillow with c-section pain, practice latching babies on for 15-20 minutes, babies fall asleep or fuss, syringe feed kids (20-30 minutes), daddy sterilized everything (hey we were newbies), mommy pumps for 20 minutes, and we finish to get about an hour sleep if lucky. Repeat at 8 pm, 11pm, 1 am, 4 am, 7 am, 10 am, 1 pm, 3 pm, 6 pm X 2 weeks = insane, very grouchy parents of twins. My milk did not come in until Friday-ish or about 5-6 days after birth, so we did use formula. And by this time, with hubby returning to work in a week and kids not looking like they are getting this breastfeeding thing, it was time to call in Lactation Consultant #2 for help or mommy was going to throw in the towel on the “no bottle” thing.
Phase III (
Haberman heaven): We discovered via weighing the kids pre and post breastfeeding that they were essentially getting nada. Since we had been supplementing with pumped milk and formula, weight was not an issue thank goodness. The new Lactation Consultant recommended something MUCH MORE sane- a bottle that helps to teach sucking that was MUCH quicker (5-10 minutes) and easier to use. Oh the heavens sang…We could now get maybe two hours of sleep between feedings and mom could even feed them both at once after practicing latch and then pump…
Phase IV (
Mom gets adventurous and pays for it, Week 2.5): So I wanted to run some errands to get out of the house, just to get the birth certificates and go to Babies R US. Four hours later (I HAD to wait for the birth certificates so my work insurance would get them by the 30 day add-on date), mom returns to house with huge engorgement problems, and major problems ensue: plugged ducts, cracked nipple... Lets just say, a certain breast pump ended up flying (or being thrown) across the room that night. However, mom bit the bullet and Pumpkin latched on to save the day. Recovery took a slow 3-4 days. Luckily no mastitis, YET. That was week 5…
(Note to self: no matter how important birth certificates are, bring hand pump, something or return home ASAP.)
Phase V (Outside help arrives,Week 3-4): Grandmother arrives to meet, greet the twins and help keep mom sane while daddy returns to work. Feeding schedule ensues like this: Weigh each twin, practice latching feeding with twin pillow use, weigh to see if they ‘GOT MILK’, use bottles to feed and then pump. I must admit I let the pumping fall by the wayside a bit as the kids were getting a wee bit of milk from me, just enough to space out pumping episodes farther apart and grandmom was here to help me set up shop and feed them. (Note to self: ‘Slight’ mistake on my part to not build up supply in the beginning but I thought I was making enough and sleep was more important.)
Phase 6: (On my own,Week 5-15) Grandmother has departed, VERY sweet sorrow as mommy is now by her lonesome during the day…Week 9ish or so, Pumpkin has struck gold and can now get a full feeding in under 30 minutes. But at this point it is not even practical for me to breastfeed one twin and practice with the other, all while attempting to keep them on the same schedule…so I wait…(Why do the twins have poor sucking? They appear to be doing well, thriving even, in all other areas and don’t appear to have major developmental issues (and I would know too, I’m a pediatric Physical Therapist)…(Apparently it is a common problem in twins, our pediatrician tells us, as his twins too had the same problem…)
Phase 7 (Mission accomplished, almost...week 15): Sweetpea has struck gold and she too can join her brother at the long awaited attempt to JUST breastfeed, no pumping, no bottles, etc…Oh wait. Problem # 100000: Mommy’s milk supply is not up to par and the only way to increase this is to pump after EVERY feeding or do marathon nursing sessions every two hours…So we attempt, a week or two of pumping and a weekend of “breastfest 2005” (or as husband called it - "boobapalooza") for the twins. The milk supply increase is slow and mommy’s return to work is impending so alas I will have to go back to pumping part time anyway only to probably have my milk supply decrease anyway…
Week 16: Well, yes folks. If you are still with me, I’m STILL at this breastfeeding thing. I’ve learned a ton, most of it way too late. I've accepted that I will probably not get to the point where I am able to JUST breastfeed before I return to work and have a few weeks of simplicity. I know there are many challenges ahead of me anyway: the “I have teeth stage, the distraction stage (This one had already begun and Pumpkin is absolutely adorable despite not eating at times and gazing up at me, smiling, giggling and talking to Sweetpea- how can I get upset at that?), etc…Anyway, check back on the many other trials and tribulations. For now, the only thing I'm looking forward to with the twins turning one is weaning, and taking a trip to Hawaii.
